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Is my clock running faster?

May 18, 2011

For the last six months I have been feeling a bit overwhelmed with everything I need to do and what I want to do.  I think it has something to do with seeing what everyone else does.  I have ideas of who I want to be as a wife, mom and homemaker.  Every time I attempt to do that stuff I feel like I get a big kick in the behind by failure and then I end up getting more irritated and depressed.  Basically I have decided there is not enough time in the day for everything.  Then I read other blogs and start to feel depressed since they seem to have the time and ability to do this stuff.  To top it off they have more kids or less time to do them in then I do.

Do not get me wrong I love these blogs and will continue to read them.  My battle is a personal one.  I need to find my happy medium and sadly that seems to be a big battle.  I am also fully aware of the fact that there is no way these woman have their lives 100% together.  I am sure there is something I have together that they do not, or at least I tell myself that.  For those who have everything together in their lives, please do not ruin this thought process for me.  Thank you!

In my process of finding time to do what I want I found I need to make a list of things that are necessary and would like to do.  My necessary things are: bath, dress the family, brush my teeth, feed my family, grocery shop, work, take care of the dogs, cleaning, gardening, homeschooling etc….  My would like to haves are: extreme couponing, making more items from scratch (ricotta cheese, spices etc…), getting together with friends,  sewing/quilting, computer time, workout  etc….

My problem is the fact I never have enough time to do what I want need to do, let alone do what I want to do.  So my conclusion has to be that my clock just runs faster than these woman.  Yes I work 2 days a week but to be honest I still do not see how those two days would allow me to do what I would like to do.  How on earth do women have time to make their own herbs, toothpaste, shampoos, deodorants, napkins, clothing, do creative crafts with their kids, make amazing meals etc…  In reality I just feel like that is just plain crazy how women run themselves ragged.  But then again maybe it is me, maybe I just do not have the energy to do it all.

If you are one of those woman who have time to do it all.  Can you please tell me how, I would love to know!  I keep telling myself “it would be great to be Amish (must have something to do with growing up in Lancaster County to want to be Amish, huh?) for a while, just long enough to learn how they do it.”  I honestly can not find time with two kids that fight as soon as I leave the room, or we have a battle at nap time or how they want some of my time (which they not only deserve and I want to give and they need!).  Between this and constant clean up around my house and the basic necessities how on earth can you possibly have time to do more.  I do not get it, come on really do these people truly have more hours in the day then I do.  I mean they must if they have time to make stuff like deodorants, shampoos, cloth napkins, clothing, dried spices etc…. while spending time with their kids and spouses and not being completely exhausted.  For me I guess I am a crazy busy mom of 2 and wife that just really has no time or energy to do everything that needs to be done.

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